This is one of those blogs I’m going to start writing in the morning and end later on in the day. Sometimes to know the end of a story you have to live it. The beginning of the story is a sick feeling in my stomach.
Today I have an appointment with the cremation people. I found a funeral home in Verdun and will head out there for 2:00 PM. I don’t know what the appointment will cover yet but I do know this brings us closer to a death certificate. It also makes everything feel more real.
I’ve never been a source of comfort for a dying person before. I find myself more impacted by his passing than I thought I would be. Especially because I don’t really know him.
I get why you have 60 days to start most death logistics now
My grandfather died on December 24th. The timing was impactful for reasons beyond the holiday. His notary was closed for vacation. All this time has felt like limbo, literally no one knows what’s on the most updated copy of the will. It turns out I can do a “will search” myself and save a few hundo. Let’s see how hard that process is.
I recently met my step-uncle for the first time. He has a copy of the will with his name on it as executor. Apparently there’s another copy with my father and aunt named. I found an invoice for a visit to a notary in 2023 so evidently my grandfather updated the will as recently as last summer.
The will matters because it largely puts the onus of responsibility for the estate on display. It may sound weird, but being an executor is a LOT of work. We know he wanted to be cremated. Still a “will search” isn’t where you start. The government says getting a death certificate is step 1. To get a death certificate you have to go through a funeral home.
The body stays in the hospital morgue until a funeral home claims them. Then you get the death certificate and can start the rest of the logistics. I feel weird and anxious today because now the logistical reality of the death is here. So is a 1150$ charge on my credit card (I could not find a cheaper cremation, holy wowza. Yes the government/state reimburses you but like out of pocket that’s a biggie).
The stuff he owned
All this is written before we see if the will allocates stuff to certain people. Without that information, one of my new projects is to go through his stuff. It sounds so callous but now we’re going to literally cherry pick what looks valuable and what looks like trash. Using tools like Facebook marketplace we can ideally liquidate most of his furniture.
He doesn’t have that much stuff. His whole place could be vacated in a focused 4-5 hours.
We still need to go through all his belongings and organize it in some capacity so people in the family can claim anything they want. He has a TV. Who gets the TV? He has a car, I plan on getting the car. Unless the paperwork specifically says otherwise, the man said I can have it.
Getting a car adds the weight of responsibility. Like if I am going to financially benefit off of someone’s death, the least I can do is manage the logistical realities. I’m sure the only part of the process a lot of people will be interested in is the divvying of loot when all is said and done.
Someone had to pay for the cremation. Someone has to literally go make sure his car gets moved for snow removal. I found out that is a real thing and I need to drive to Greenfield Park today to leave the car keys with his neighbour. Thankfully the people at this retired people apartment complex he lived at liked my grandfather enough to hold him down like that.
Once I get the paperwork I will start the process of closing accounts and figuring out what the final balance of everything he owes. Apparently landlords can charge the estate the remainder of the rent on the lease unless you come to an agreement. (I can see how landlords would be like fuck that rent price, let’s raise it).
It’s just really real. I barely knew him yet I feel strongly about all this. Maybe it’s because of the role I’m currently playing.
The temporary death certificate
I walked out of the funeral home appointment with homework and the papers that should let me close my grandfather’s accounts. Since I paid, so far I’m the one who is responsible for doing this as far as the legal process is concerned. Now when I go through his paperwork to figure out what accounts he has, I feel the purpose and clarity of the mission. .
If I don’t do the homework it will make the government have to do it instead, which will delay the real death certificate. I need his SIN number, thankfully that should be easy enough to find. There are a few other family details I maybe should have, but don’t because my grandfather wasn’t around much in my life. I probably could have made more of an effort to find out key info before he died, but I never Googled the death process before.
I low-key procrastinated on going back to his place to clean up. Without a clear sense of what to do next it was just going through stuff. The nice lady at the funeral home was helpful and answered all my questions. Still now that I have an official piece of paper from a funeral home stating my grandfather is in fact dead, I can move on with the rest of it.
The next step is to start contacting companies to end his contracts. I’ve heard the estate has to pay the full amount owed on any contract like rent or internet remaining. I’ll keep you posted on that as I learn more.
The cremation will take place over the next 5-10 business days. Then I will go back to the funeral home and will probably write part 2 to this.
Live Long and Prosper Everyone